I never imagined one of my kids would face trouble expressing himself at school—much less that it would be Matthew. As you know, Matt is non-verbal, and while we’ve always known he has communication impairment, we’ve encouraged him to believe in his own abilities no matter the limitations.
Though non-verbal, we’ve always taught him that if you “know the word, say the word, act the word”, he can bridge the gap. That’s why it caught me completely off guard when I received a phone call from school about a “verbal incident” in which something Matthew uttered offended another child. While he has mastered few hundred words in his vocabulary, Matthew uses an AAC device (alternative augmentative communication) to communicate at school.
Matthew is in 7th grade this year, and for the first time he was able to choose band as one of his electives. One of the things I’ve always appreciated about Hays ISD is the inclusive environment—it gives me peace knowing he’s welcomed and supported. This week, during band class, Matt was paired with a female student. In their interaction, he used his device to say, “I want squeeze.” Not long after, the student reported to the teacher that she felt the word “squeeze” was inappropriate. The teacher responded by having Matthew apologize, and reached out to us to ensure that we have this dialogue with Matthew on boundaries! Apparently, he wanted a hug!!!!
For those who know us and how we have handled #AngelmanSyndrome’s deprivation of typical experences, Matthew uttering a word, expressing himself and every word and every attempt of communication is such a huge milestone. He has worked so hard to express himself, and we’ve always encouraged him never to give up—no matter how imperfect or awkward his words may sound. To see a simple phrase, spoken through his device, become misunderstood and labeled as something wrong is baffling.
My reaction to the phone call has been with mixed feelings. I want to ensure that every child is being heard no matter how trivial the incident is. We have addressed the issue with Matt, and made assurance to both Band teacher & SpecialEd teacher that we will make changes to his AAC vocabulary.
To my friends who are SpecialEd teachers … Tara, McKensie, Stephanie, Ambia … how do you think we should handle this with the school? To my Angelman parents who are reading this … any dealings similar to our experience and how you have handled it?